Why the strongest women wear invisible masks | Samantha Lubanzu | TEDxTrafford

Key Concepts

• Masking: The act of concealing one’s true self, emotions, or identity to navigate societal expectations or challenging environments.
• Microaggressions: Subtle, often unintentional expressions of prejudice or discrimination.
• Intersectionality: The interconnected nature of social categorizations such as race, class, and gender, creating overlapping systems of discrimination or disadvantage.
• Authenticity: The practice of living in alignment with one’s true self, values, and beliefs.
• Allyship: The active support of marginalized groups by individuals who are not members of those groups.
• Resilience: The capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.
• Inclusion: The practice of creating environments where all individuals feel valued, respected, and have equal access to opportunities.

The Weight of Masks: A Journey to Authenticity

Samantha’s narrative centers on the pervasive experience of “masking” – concealing one’s true self – particularly within the context of race, gender, and professional life. Her story is a powerful testament to the emotional and psychological toll of navigating spaces that are not designed for authenticity, and a call to action for both individuals and leaders to dismantle the systems that necessitate masking.

Early Life and the Formation of a Mask

Samantha begins by acknowledging the improbable nature of her presence, a life sustained by faith and her mother’s encouragement: “All things are possible.” Her early life, rooted in her Caribbean Jamaican heritage and the working-class environment of Manchester, provided a foundation of resilience. She vividly recalls sensory details – the smell of jerk chicken, the rhythm of steel pans – establishing a strong sense of cultural belonging. However, this sense of belonging was challenged at age 11 when transitioning to a more affluent, less diverse high school. The repeated question, “Where are you really from?” highlighted the persistent questioning of her identity and the beginning of her masking.

She describes resourcefulness developed through early work – pot washing and car minding during Manchester City football matches – as valuable lessons carried into her corporate career. Despite the hardships, she frames these experiences as building blocks for resilience.

Navigating Corporate Spaces and Systemic Barriers

At 16, Samantha secured her first corporate role, fueled by her faith and her mother’s belief in her potential. However, she immediately encountered systemic barriers: racism, sexism, microaggressions, and bullying. She details the constant feeling of being an outsider, a “not fit,” while climbing the corporate ladder.

She cites statistics to underscore the prevalence of these experiences: “75% of black women experience racism at work. 75%. And they’re twice as likely to be passed over for promotion.” While acknowledging she didn’t need data to validate her lived experience, the statistics serve to quantify the widespread nature of the problem.

Samantha explains that her masking wasn’t passive, but a strategic survival mechanism. She describes instances where she smiled when she wanted to cry, nodded when she disagreed, and pretended to belong, all to navigate spaces that weren’t built for her. A particularly poignant example involves a senior leader attempting to connect with team members based on assumed shared experiences – Wimbledon for one colleague, festivals for another – and then turning to her with the expectation of “prison” as a common denominator. This illustrates the damaging impact of stereotypes and the pressure to conform.

The Power of Allyship and the Pursuit of Authenticity

The narrative highlights the transformative impact of allyship, specifically through the example of “Clive,” a white senior leader who actively championed overlooked talent. “One ally can change a career. Be someone's Clive. The one that opened the doors, not the one that closes them.” Samantha emphasizes that while allies are crucial for opening doors, it is ultimately the individual who must possess the faith, determination, and resilience to walk through them.

Despite achieving significant success – chairing the CIPD, winning awards, becoming a CEO – Samantha confesses she continued to wear the “Superwoman” mask. She acknowledges the initial pride in this persona but ultimately recognizes its detrimental effects: “Perfection isn't protection. That is the prison.” She concludes that masks don’t protect, they silence, and that true power lies in authenticity.

Legacy and a Call to Action

Samantha frames her journey not just as personal liberation, but as a legacy for her seven children – three sons and four daughters. She is actively building a future where her children don’t feel compelled to hide their true selves. She emphasizes that silence is not strength and that their joy and resilience fuel her.

Her challenge to the audience is threefold:

1. Self-Reflection: To identify the masks they are wearing.
2. Leadership Responsibility: For leaders to be “Clives,” actively seeking out and championing overlooked talent.
3. Collective Action: For colleagues to question biases and create safe spaces where authenticity can flourish.

She concludes with a powerful statement: “Removing the mask is not just freeing yourself, it's freeing the generation behind you.”

Technical Terms & Concepts

• CIPD: Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development – a professional body for HR and people development.
• Microaggression: Everyday slights, insults, invalidations or offensive behaviors that communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative messages to target persons based solely upon their marginalized group membership.
• Intersectionality: A framework for understanding how aspects of a person's social and political identities combine to create unique modes of discrimination and privilege.

Logical Connections

The narrative follows a clear chronological progression, starting with Samantha’s early life and the initial formation of her mask, then detailing her experiences navigating systemic barriers in the corporate world, and culminating in her realization of the importance of authenticity and her call to action. Each section builds upon the previous one, demonstrating how early experiences shaped her later choices and ultimately led to her current perspective. The examples provided – the Wimbledon/festival anecdote, the story of Clive – serve to illustrate the broader points about bias, allyship, and the power of individual action.

Synthesis/Conclusion

Samantha’s story is a compelling and deeply personal exploration of the challenges faced by marginalized individuals in navigating a world that often demands conformity. Her journey from a young girl questioning her belonging to a successful CEO dismantling systemic barriers is a testament to the power of resilience, faith, and the courage to embrace authenticity. The core takeaway is a powerful call to action: to dismantle the systems that necessitate masking, to cultivate allyship, and to prioritize authenticity – not just for ourselves, but for the generations to come. The message is clear: true freedom lies not in perfection, but in permission – permission to be real, unapologetic, and free.