What kids know about motivation (and we don't) | Betsy Blackard | TEDxClaremontGraduateUniversity

Key Concepts

• The Running Leap: A metaphor for how children approach challenges, involving a preparatory "backing up" phase to build confidence and momentum before tackling a larger task.
• Intrinsic Motivation: A child's internal drive to engage in activities for their own sake, rather than external rewards or pressures.
• Self-Trust: A child's belief in their own abilities and judgment, fostered by successful navigation of challenges.
• Purposeful Procrastination: The strategic delay of a task to engage in preparatory activities that build confidence and readiness.
• Confidence Building Process: The iterative steps a child takes to increase their self-assurance, often through mastering smaller, related tasks.

The Running Leap: Understanding and Fostering Children's Motivation

This presentation, drawing on over 20 years of experience with children and a PhD in developmental psychology, proposes a novel framework for understanding children's motivation: the "running leap." The core idea is that children, when faced with challenges, often engage in a preparatory phase of "backing up" to ensure a successful "leap" forward. This is not an avoidance of the challenge, but rather a strategic maneuver to build confidence and readiness.

The Running Leap Demonstration and Analogy

The concept is illustrated through a demonstration with an audience volunteer, Mina, who is asked to cross an increasingly wider stream. Mina naturally backs up further to successfully jump across wider gaps. This action, the speaker argues, is analogous to how children approach life's challenges. The bigger the challenge, the more they need to "back up" to ensure their "running leap" is successful.

Case Study 1: The Water Slide

A vivid example is presented of a young girl at a community pool who is frozen at the top of a large water slide, exhibiting fear. Instead of confronting the big slide, she retreats to a much smaller toddler slide. Her mother attempts to motivate her by urging her to go back to the big slide, calling the toddler slide "for babies." However, the girl is not avoiding the challenge; she is using the baby slide to build confidence. She slides down feet first, head first, and backwards, clearly enjoying herself. This "baby slide business" is described as mastering a smaller challenge to build confidence. The girl is observed stealing glances at the big slide, indicating her underlying motivation. Eventually, she returns to the big slide and successfully navigates it. The speaker emphasizes that understanding the "running leap" allows caregivers to see this as intrinsic motivation at play, rather than a sign of fear or avoidance, thus reducing the burden of being the sole motivator.

Case Study 2: Math Homework and the "Pop"

Another example involves a second grader struggling with math homework. The child expresses extreme distress, stating, "Oh no, I'm going to pop." She then leaps out of her seat and crawls under a table. The speaker, understanding the "running leap," interprets this not as defiance, but as a need for a confidence boost. The child is "backing up" from the challenging math task. The speaker suggests a compromise: after each math problem, the child can "pop" once and then return to the next problem. This initial compromise leads to the child completing one problem. However, it becomes clear that one "pop" is insufficient. The routine evolves to include a full lap of frog leaps around the table between each problem. This strategy, while seemingly unconventional, is presented as more effective than forcing the child to focus, as it respects her need to "back up" further. The speaker highlights that by trusting the child's process and "doing nothing" but observing and supporting her backward steps, the power struggle is avoided, and the homework eventually gets done.

The Argument Against Forcing and the Power of Intrinsic Motivation

The presentation challenges the common parental fear that allowing children to "back up" will lead them to never take the "running leap." It argues that this perspective assumes children will give up without intervention and that caregivers must be their constant motivation. Instead, the speaker advocates for fostering intrinsic motivation. When a child truly wants something (e.g., to play, to do well in school), they will persist. Forcing a child to take a leap they are not ready for can backfire, leading to resentment, feelings of incompetence, and decreased confidence, which in turn widens the perceived "stream" and necessitates even more "backing up."

Recognizing and Acknowledging the Running Leap

The key takeaway is to help children recognize their own "running leap" strategy. By acknowledging their process, caregivers can strengthen a child's self-trust and provide them with a valuable tool for future challenges. The speaker suggests using language that describes what the child did, such as telling the water slide girl, "You wanted to go down the big slide and you knew just what you needed to get there. You went down the little slide first to build your confidence and it worked." This helps children "procrastinate purposefully."

Personal Example: The PhD Journey

The speaker shares a personal anecdote about their own journey to obtaining a PhD. After years of formal education, they felt burnt out and took a break to become a "beach bum" in Florida, rediscovering reading for pleasure. Their parents, though anxious, understood the "running leap" concept and avoided applying excessive pressure. After six months, the speaker felt inspired to pursue a PhD in child development. This experience demonstrates how a period of "backing up" and self-discovery can lead to a successful "running leap" towards a significant goal.

Conclusion and Actionable Insights

The presentation concludes by urging caregivers to "do nothing" when a child appears to be backing away from a challenge. Instead, they should look for signs of the "running leap" and trust that the child is preparing themselves. If action is desired, caregivers can ask themselves what the child is doing and how it is already working for them. The focus should be on bolstering self-trust and strengthening the confidence-building process, helping the child's "backward steps" be as strong as possible to ensure their "running leap" is a success. This approach fosters a virtuous cycle where increased confidence leads to less resistance and greater success.