The moments in between | Michael Wilkins | TEDxEtTagammo

Key Concepts:

• Moments in Between: The often overlooked, small, and challenging instances (pain, loneliness, anxiety) where true personal transformation occurs.
• Affirmations: Positive statements repeated regularly to challenge negative thoughts and influence the subconscious mind.
• Ritual of Hope: A consistent, intentional practice (like the speaker's breakfast routine) that provides mental and spiritual sustenance, fostering optimism and resilience.
• Intentional Living: Approaching each day and specific actions with purpose and conscious decision-making.
• Purpose and Higher Calling: The underlying reason for one's existence and the drive to contribute beyond personal gain.
• Leadership Transformation: The process of evolving one's leadership style and effectiveness, often through self-reflection and challenging assumptions.
• Shattered Assumptions: The experience of having deeply held beliefs or preconceptions disproven, leading to new understanding.
• Seizing the Moment: Recognizing and acting decisively on opportunities as they arise, often after significant preparation.
• Focus and Energy Flow: The principle that one's energy and resources naturally gravitate towards what one concentrates on.

The Power of "Moments in Between" The speaker posits that true transformation and the shaping of lives do not primarily occur during major milestones, celebrations, or significant news, but rather in the "moments in between." These are the often-overlooked periods of "hurting, the pain, the loneliness, the anxiety," where profound personal change and growth are truly forged.

Personal Journey of Overcoming Cancer In October 2010, the speaker received a life-altering diagnosis: "You have cancer." However, he identifies his most transformative moment not as the diagnosis itself, but three minutes later, while sitting in his car, when he began to affirm, "You're cancer free. You're totally healed." This became a daily practice, particularly during breakfast, which he elevated to "the most sacred time of day" for reciting his affirmations.

During his first day of chemotherapy, described as "a dark day" where patients "seemed like they were already dead," he was "scared" and "nervous." To counter this, he actively visualized his body "being whole, supernaturally vibrant, and alive again." His doctors were notably "curious why I was so upbeat," to which he attributed his intentional breakfast routine, stating, "Because I ate breakfast like my life depended on it." Breakfast transcended mere food, becoming a "ritual of hope," providing essential "mental and spiritual" fuel.

A Profound Encounter and a Mother's Wisdom During his chemotherapy, the speaker encountered Michael, a 6-year-old boy with an "infectious smile" who was also undergoing treatment, describing him as a "ray of hope." Later, he learned that Michael had passed away ("met heaven"), a moment that caused deep sorrow. However, Michael's mother offered a powerful perspective: "Michael, my son was not supposed to live six months. We had him for seven years. He lived each day with intent, with a smile, and he knew he was going to make it. Now you go live. You go inspire." This statement profoundly impacted the speaker, a moment that both "broke me and built me."

Remission and the Power of Affirmation After 90 days of consistent affirmations, the speaker received a call from his doctors confirming, "Your cancer's in remission." His powerful response was, "I had cancer. It didn't have me." He asserts that "cancer has not entered me again" since that day, emphasizing his belief that "it's not just what you say, it's how you say it in the moment."

From Healing to Purpose: Leadership Transformation Following his recovery, the speaker joined a cancer survivors group, where he was the only man among women. He realized this experience transcended his personal healing, becoming about his "purpose, my higher calling, my way to give back." He now leverages his experience to help men achieve "stronger leadership, optimizing their health principles, elevating their financial freedom," specifically using "breakfast as a catalyst to transform their leadership." He highlights that "it's not just about your position, it's about your responses in the quiet."

Challenging Assumptions: The ADA Committee Experience In 2006, prior to his cancer diagnosis, the speaker chaired an American Disabilities Act (ADA) transit committee. He recounted an incident where he offered to open a door for a lady in a wheelchair who had no arms, no legs, and was deaf. Using a pencil in her mouth to tap on a computer, she typed, "I don't need your help." This moment "shattered my assumptions," teaching him that "disability doesn't necessarily mean inability." It also "transformed my leadership," instilling a crucial lesson about "allowing people space to make their own decisions without my own assumptions."

Historical Example: Seizing the Moment The speaker references May 16th, 1983, at Bold Town's 25th anniversary, when Michael Jackson, after the Jacksons exited the stage, sang "Billie Jean" and introduced the moonwalk. This iconic performance, "epitomizing the world of music, seizing the moment," was presented as an example of "moments paying off" after "years of preparedness, pain, and clarity."

Actionable Insights and Concluding Challenges The speaker concludes with a powerful call to action, encouraging listeners to reflect on what they will do in their "moments in between." He offers a guiding mantra: "If I believe it, I can achieve it. What I think about, I bring about." He then presents specific challenges for the morning:

• "Feed your body with intent."
• "Feed your mind with affirmations."
• "Feed your future with health."
• "Feed your purpose with leadership."
• "Feed your financial freedom with discipline." The overarching principle is that "moments come and go, but what you do in the moments in between can change the course of your life." He reiterates the crucial concept: "Where your focus goes, your energy flows."

Synthesis and Main Takeaways The core message is that profound personal and leadership transformation occurs not in grand events, but in the intentional and conscious navigation of the "moments in between" – particularly during adversity. Through personal anecdotes of overcoming cancer, challenging assumptions, and inspiring others, the speaker demonstrates the power of affirmations, intentional routines (like breakfast as a "ritual of hope"), and a clear sense of purpose. The ability to respond thoughtfully and purposefully in quiet, challenging moments, coupled with focused energy, is presented as the key to shaping one's life, health, purpose, and financial freedom.