Stephen A. Smith: This Is A Major Example Of When I've Totally Changed My Mind

Key Concepts

• Ownership vs. Employment: The fundamental difference in responsibility, mindset, and reward between owning a business and being an employee.
• The "180" Shift: A significant change in perspective or belief, specifically regarding the challenges of business ownership.
• The Burden of Responsibility: The psychological weight of being accountable for employees' livelihoods and the impact on personal peace.
• The "Smell the Roses" Analogy: The contrast between enjoying current achievements and the relentless drive for future goals, particularly in the context of entrepreneurship.
• The "No Stop Sign" Mentality: The continuous pursuit of goals and the inherent nature of successful people to always look ahead.
• Personal Fulfillment vs. Professional Drive: The tension between the demands of business ownership and finding happiness and peace in personal life, particularly through family.

The Unforeseen Hardship of Business Ownership

The discussion centers on a profound shift in perspective regarding business ownership. The speaker, who built a career on opinions, admits to a significant "180" regarding the reality of owning a business. Contrary to initial expectations, the experience has proven far more challenging than anticipated.

Key Points on Ownership Challenges:

• Constant Feeling of Underachievement: Despite achievements, the owner wakes up daily feeling as though nothing has been accomplished.
• Dominance of Future Tasks: Thoughts are perpetually focused on what needs to be done, rather than what has been done.
• Mental Preparation Gap: The speaker acknowledges that while they wouldn't change their decision to own, they would have prepared themselves mentally for the immense challenges.
• Impact on Loved Ones: The demanding nature of ownership makes it difficult for those close to the owner to be around them.
• Misperception by Others: Despite blessings and fortune (e.g., ESPN contract, Sirius XM deal), those with less often see the outward success and question the owner's struggles, failing to grasp the internal pressures.

The Weight of Responsibility:

A core aspect of ownership highlighted is the immense responsibility that comes with it. The speaker manages approximately 22 people (freelancers, contractors, employees), and their livelihoods are directly tied to the owner's success.

• Leadership and Accountability: This responsibility is defined as leadership and ownership, carrying a "tremendous, tremendous responsibility."
• Devoid of Peace: This constant accountability leads to a lack of personal peace, as the focus is always on the "next" thing.
• The Disconnect with Employees: Even with supportive employees who love and work for the owner, they don't fully comprehend the owner's internal drive and pressure, as they don't "own with you." They often encourage the owner to "smell the roses," a concept the owner struggles to embrace.

The "Well-Paid" vs. "Rich" Distinction:

A significant quote from a "black entrepreneur" is shared, emphasizing the difference between being well-paid and being rich: "until you own, you can never. If you don't own, you're just well paid until you own. That's when you can be rich." This underscores that true wealth and its associated rewards come with ownership, but also with its inherent responsibilities.

The "No Stop Sign" Mentality:

The discussion delves into the mindset of successful individuals, particularly in relation to goal setting and achievement.

• Mike Tomlin's Standard: The speaker references Mike Tomlin, coach of the Steelers, stating that "the standard is the standard." This implies that once a goal is set, achieving it is merely meeting the baseline, and the focus immediately shifts to the next, higher standard.
• Married to the Process: The emphasis is on being "married to the process" rather than the "end game."
• Continuous Pursuit: Successful people "don't stop." The moment a goal is achieved, their thoughts turn to the next objective. This necessitates an attitude of "no stop sign" and continuous forward momentum.

Finding Moments of Happiness Amidst the Drive

Despite the relentless pursuit of goals and the inherent pressures of ownership, the speaker finds moments of profound happiness and fulfillment, primarily through their family.

The Power of Daughters:

• Two Beautiful Daughters: The speaker expresses deep love for their two daughters, Samantha and Nyla, describing them as their "everything."
• Paralyzing Joy: Interactions with their daughters, even mundane ones like facetimes or hearing their voices, can "paralyze" the speaker, stopping them in their tracks and making "nothing matter" for those few seconds.
• Personal Roses: The speaker redefines "smelling the roses" as the actions they take that facilitate their daughters' happiness. The ability to provide for them and see them smile is their ultimate reward and source of joy. This is contrasted with the potential misery of not being able to offer them anything.

Overcoming Grief:

A poignant personal anecdote is shared about the loss of the speaker's mother in 2017 after a battle with cancer. The speaker believed they would "never know happiness in my life again." This experience highlights the depth of their current happiness, which is amplified by the contrast with that period of profound grief. The presence of other loved ones (sisters, security, personal assistant) is acknowledged, but the joy derived from their daughters is presented as a unique and powerful force.