Let go to let grow | Yashna Prasad | TEDxDPS Fulbari Youth

Key Concepts

• Perfectionism: The relentless pursuit of flawlessness and high standards, often at the expense of well-being.
• Letting Go: Releasing the need for control and accepting imperfections to foster growth and happiness.
• Authenticity: Embracing one's true self, including emotions and passions, rather than conforming to external expectations.
• Emotional Intelligence: Recognizing and valuing emotions as a fundamental aspect of being human.
• Self-Permission: Granting oneself the freedom to rest, breathe, and prioritize happiness.

The Cost of Perfection & The Power of Letting Go

Yashna’s talk centers on the detrimental effects of striving for perfection and the liberating power of letting go, ultimately advocating for authenticity and self-compassion. The presentation begins with a physical exercise – making a fist and then opening the hand – to illustrate the transition from tension (holding on) to possibility (letting go). This serves as a metaphor for the emotional burden of perfectionism.

The Cycle of Chasing Perfection

Yashna recounts a childhood immersed in a culture that glorified perfection – “perfect grades, perfect smiles, perfect behavior.” This led her to relentlessly pursue validation through achievement, becoming a “girl who never said no, who never rested.” While outwardly appearing successful, she experienced internal turmoil, characterized by nightly crying and a feeling of inadequacy despite external applause. She highlights the paradox of being surrounded by praise while feeling “dissolated inside.” This internal conflict stemmed from striving to meet others’ expectations rather than her own.

The Breaking Point & Rediscovering Joy

The turning point arrived when, facing exhaustion and disillusionment, Yashna questioned the purpose of her relentless pursuit of perfection: “What am I even doing this for? Why am I trying to be perfect in a world that does not even bother to stop and ask me if I am okay?” This moment of self-reflection led to a “beautiful breaking” – a shift in focus from how can I be perfect? to how can I be happy?

This prompted a reconnection with her childhood passions, specifically katak (a classical Indian dance form) and her ghungroo (ankle bells used in Kathak). After a seven-year hiatus, resuming this activity wasn’t about technical proficiency (“My spins were off and my feet was definitely not in beats”), but about rediscovering joy and performing “solely for my happiness.”

Letting Go: Courage, Permission, and Humanity

Yashna defines letting go not as quitting, but as “a powerful act of courage” – a declaration of self-worth: “I deserve to breathe too.” It’s about granting oneself “permission to breathe, permission to rest, and permission to be a human.” She addresses the societal tendency to criticize emotional expression, recounting an instance where someone labeled her “too emotional.” Her response – “Thank you because being emotional means I have feelings” – underscores the importance of embracing emotions as a sign of humanity. She contrasts human emotional capacity with the efficiency and “perfection” of machines, noting that machines lack the capacity for joy, dance, or inner peace.

Growth with Grace & Authenticity

Yashna concludes by stating she still pursues growth, but now does so “with grace and not guilt,” and “with freedom and not fear.” Her central message is that individuals are “never meant to be perfect,” but rather “meant to be real.” She encourages the audience to relinquish external expectations and embrace the peace that comes with authenticity. She emphasizes that “imperfections are not inadequacies,” but rather a shared human experience.

Notable Quote

“At the end of the day, the most beautiful dance is the one you do with yourself.” – Yashna, emphasizing the importance of self-acceptance and finding joy in one's own journey.

Synthesis

Yashna’s talk is a powerful testament to the importance of self-compassion and authenticity. She illustrates how the relentless pursuit of perfection can be deeply damaging, leading to internal conflict and a loss of joy. By embracing imperfections and prioritizing happiness, individuals can unlock their potential for growth and find peace within themselves. The core takeaway is a call to let go of external expectations and reconnect with one’s true self, recognizing that vulnerability and emotional expression are not weaknesses, but essential components of a fulfilling life.