How to live with grace in a hostile world | Dr. David Anderson | TEDxUCincinnati

Key Concepts:

• Gracism: Extending positive favor to other people regardless of, and sometimes because of, their color, class, or culture.
• Racism: Speaking, acting, or thinking negatively about someone solely based on their color, class, or culture.
• Grace: Extending positive favor to people even though they don't deserve it, can't earn it, or repay it.
• The Eight (and Ten) Sayings of a Gracist: Principles to incorporate into life to foster a more positive environment.

I. Personal Anecdote: The Genesis of Gracism

• The speaker, David Anderson, recounts an incident from his childhood where he punched a boy named Dylan for calling him the n-word.
• His mother, a Christian, instructed him to apologize to Dylan, despite the racial slur.
• This experience led Anderson to coin the term "gracism," which he defines as extending positive favor to others regardless of their background.
• He contrasts this with racism, which he defines as negative actions or thoughts based solely on someone's color, class, or culture.

II. Early Experiences with Racism and Family Response

• Anderson describes repeated instances of Dylan using the n-word on the school bus, leading to the physical altercation.
• He shares a story of his family moving into a predominantly white neighborhood in Adelfi, Maryland, where they faced a racist act: a cross was burned on their lawn, and their dogwood tree was damaged.
• His mother's resolute response, "God gave us this house, and we're staying right here," demonstrated resilience and a refusal to be intimidated by racism.
• This incident highlighted that gracism is not just about experiencing racism but about how one responds to it with grace.

III. The Eight Sayings of a Gracist

• Anderson outlines eight principles that define a gracist, emphasizing proactive, positive actions rather than simply being "anti-racist."
  1. I will lift you up: Elevating and assisting others towards success. He uses the analogy of an "elevator of grace."
  2. I will cover you: (Not explicitly explained in detail in the transcript)
  3. I will share with you: (Not explicitly explained in detail in the transcript)
  4. I will honor you: (Not explicitly explained in detail in the transcript)
  5. I will stand with you: The majority supporting the minority, the stronger helping the weaker. Example: standing with a marginalized group in a college to ensure their inclusion and safety.
  6. I will consider you: (Not explicitly explained in detail in the transcript)
  7. I will celebrate with you: (Not explicitly explained in detail in the transcript)
  8. I will heal with you: (Not explicitly explained in detail in the transcript)
• He shares an anecdote about a Jewish family who adopted these sayings as their "family constitution," emphasizing their importance in daily life.

IV. Bonus Sayings: Expanding the Gracist Mindset

• Anderson introduces two additional sayings, inspired by an African proverb: "From afar, I thought he was a monster; when he got closer, I realized he was my brother."
  1. I refuse to pass judgment: Reserving judgment until obtaining sufficient information and understanding.
  2. I will choose to use difference as a doorway for dialogue: Using differences as opportunities for conversation and empathy. He illustrates this with an encounter with a cashier who had a tattoo of her ex-boyfriend's name on her cheek.

V. Conclusion: The Power of Personal Transformation

• Anderson reflects on the outcome of his apology to Dylan: while it didn't lead to a dramatic reconciliation, it transformed him.
• This personal transformation enabled him to facilitate transformative conversations and bridge divides in various settings, including cities, colleges, and corporations.
• He emphasizes that embracing gracism, even in the face of continued racism, can lead to positive change in the world.
• The key takeaway is that personal change and a commitment to gracism can have a ripple effect, fostering understanding and peace.