How being neurodivergent affects my life | Alessia Block | TEDxUniversityCollegeRoosevelt

Key Concepts:

• Self-awareness: Understanding one's thoughts, preferences, emotions, behavior, and how they differ from others.
• Neurodiversity: Variation in the human brain regarding sociability, learning, attention, mood, and other mental functions.
• Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD): A developmental disability that affects how a person behaves, interacts with others, communicates, and learns.
• Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD): A chronic condition including attention difficulty, hyperactivity, and impulsiveness.
• Executive Dysfunction: Difficulties with cognitive processes that control and regulate behavior, such as planning, organization, and task initiation.
• Self-criticism: The tendency to evaluate oneself negatively and harshly.
• Self-consciousness: Excessive awareness of oneself and concern about being observed by others.

Diagnosis and Initial Reaction (2016, Age 10):

• Diagnosed with both autism and ADHD after moving from Argentina to Berlin. Teachers recognized potential neurodivergence.
• Initial reaction was not profound; more concerned with childhood interests (Pokemon) than understanding the diagnosis.
• The speaker refers to the combination of autism and ADHD as their "combo pack."

High School and Overlooking ADHD:

• Focused primarily on the autism aspect of the diagnosis due to social challenges.
• Academically successful in high school: top of class, awards, scholarships, prom committee chair, university acceptances, prestigious choir.
• ADHD was overlooked because academic performance was strong.

College Struggles and the Realization of ADHD's Impact:

• College presented significant challenges: simple tasks became difficult (texting, appointments).
• Experienced disorganization and difficulty initiating tasks (homework, TED Talk script).
• Attributed struggles initially to laziness or incompetence, fueled by an internal "devil" voice.
• Realized ADHD was a significant factor, bringing issues like disorganization, attention dysregulation, insomnia, and executive dysfunction.
• This realization provided relief (not just laziness) and explained why the speaker didn't fit the "hyperorganized autistic person" stereotype.

Benefits of Self-Awareness:

• Facilitated adjustments to daily life (e.g., buying a laundry basket).
• Enabled letting go of negative self-criticism.
• Encouraged seeking help from peers, professors, parents, and psychiatrists.

The Dark Side of Over-Self-Awareness:

• Increased self-criticism due to awareness of "abnormal" behavior or potential to make people uncomfortable.
• Over-self-awareness can lead to self-consciousness: replaying social interactions, hyperfixating on mistakes.
• Executive dysfunction exacerbates learned helplessness: buying supplies for hobbies but never starting due to fear of failure.
• Can lead to a paralyzing cycle of self-critical introspection.

Self-Awareness as a Double-Edged Sword:

• Self-awareness can promote growth, adaptation, and self-understanding when used correctly.
• Must avoid the trap of excessive self-criticism, which harms self-esteem.
• Need to balance self-awareness with self-acceptance, listening to the "angel" voice over the "devil" voice.

Neurodiversity and Self-Awareness:

• Neurodivergent individuals often have an additional layer of self-awareness, needing to understand how their different brain affects functioning.
• Diagnosis is not a magic solution for self-awareness; it takes time and effort.
• Self-awareness can extend outward to create a more inclusive and accepting environment for everyone.

Notable Quotes:

• "I was 10. I was more concerned about whether I could beat my cousin's Pokemon with my Pikachu than dissecting my brain chemistry." - Illustrates the speaker's initial lack of engagement with their diagnosis.
• "Self-awareness is like a double-edged sword. Used correctly, it can help us to grow, adapt, and understand ourselves. At the same time, we have to be careful not to fall into the trap of being overly self-critical, which can really hurt our self-esteem and drag us down." - Summarizes the central theme of the talk.

Synthesis/Conclusion:

The speaker's journey with autism and ADHD highlights the complexities of self-awareness. While diagnosis and understanding one's neurodivergence can be empowering, it also carries the risk of increased self-criticism and self-consciousness. The key takeaway is the importance of balancing self-awareness with self-acceptance and seeking support to navigate the challenges and harness the strengths that come with neurodiversity. The ultimate goal is to extend this self-awareness outward, fostering a more inclusive and understanding world for everyone.