Hedging: The language tool that can change your life | Alice Ashcroft | TEDxScarisbrick

Key Concepts

• Hedging: The use of linguistic devices to soften or qualify statements, often conveying uncertainty, humility, or deference. Examples include "I think," "maybe," "sort of."
• Gendered Language: Language that reflects or perpetuates gender stereotypes and biases.
• Agency: The capacity of individuals to act independently and make their own free choices.
• Double Bind: A situation where an individual faces contradictory expectations, leading to negative consequences regardless of their choice.
• Intentional Language: Consciously choosing words and phrases to achieve specific communication goals.
• The Power of Why: A technique of asking "why" to understand the reasoning behind statements and uncover underlying assumptions or expertise.

Hedging: A Linguistic Tool and its Gendered Dimensions

The speaker begins by acknowledging the irony of discussing hedging, a linguistic phenomenon they themselves frequently employ despite researching it. Hedging, short for "hedging your bets in language," involves using phrases like "I think," "maybe," and "sort of." First identified by linguists in the 1970s, it's a common, often unconscious, communication strategy.

Understanding Hedging and its Impact

Hedging is prevalent in everyday communication, seen in adding qualifiers to emails or downplaying expertise. While many are aware of their own hedging habits, understanding why it's used and its impact is crucial. Modern research suggests hedging can be a political tool, enabling individuals to enact agency. However, researchers face challenges in understanding its motivations without direct interrogation.

The Gender Dimension of Hedging

A significant aspect of hedging is its gendered dimension. Research indicates that women use hedging more frequently than men. This disproportionate use correlates with how women are perceived in leadership roles. The speaker highlights that women who speak more directly often face negative performance feedback compared to men using identical language. This creates a "double bind": assertiveness without mitigation risks social penalties, while excessive softening undermines authority and credibility. A humorous tweet, "My goal is to start being more assertive if it's okay with you guys," perfectly encapsulates this predicament.

Hedging as an Intentional Tool

Despite its potential pitfalls, hedging is not inherently negative. It can be a powerful tool when used intentionally. The speaker introduces the "button example" from software development. Instead of saying, "I think the button should go on the left," one could say, "As you know, the button should go on the left." This hedges by assuming shared knowledge or social order, a different strategy than simply stating an opinion. Other examples of intentional hedging include:

• "You know, I have experience in this area."
• "You know, last time we went out at 11 p.m. we missed the brunch booking."
• "You know how meal times are a capitalist scam?"
• "You know, I finished those three projects."

These examples demonstrate how "you know" can be used to assert knowledge or shared understanding, rather than expressing uncertainty.

The Power of "Why"

The speaker's favorite technique for analyzing hedging is the singular word, "why," termed "the power of why." As an autistic person, the speaker has used "why" to unravel uncertainty throughout their life. Applying this to the button example:

1. Person A: "I think the button should go on the left."
2. Person B: "The button should go on the right."

Traditionally, Person B's more confident statement might be favored. However, by asking "why," both parties are prompted to explain their reasoning. This allows for the identification of who is downplaying expertise and who is framing opinions as facts. The speaker recounts a childhood experience where their persistent questioning of "why" about prime numbers led to a lengthy explanation from their teacher. This illustrates that questioning "why" is not about being difficult but about seeking genuine understanding.

Navigating Communication as an Individual

The speaker suggests two strategies for navigating communication, particularly for neurodivergent individuals:

1. Communicate Information Needs: Informing new teams about how information and tasks are best received. Following Ellie Middleton's advice, this involves requesting information on a "what, by, when, and why" basis, with the "why" being crucial for motivation.
2. Provide Your "Why": Explaining one's own reasons ("giving my why") prevents misunderstandings in various life situations.

Intentional Language and the Double Bind

The question of whether to eliminate all hedging is answered with a "no." Blanket removal can lead to being labeled as "difficult" or "awkward." The "damned if I do, damned if I don't" predicament, or the double bind, requires a more nuanced approach.

The solution lies in intentional language, which involves deploying or withholding hedging based on context, audience, and goals. This transforms hedging from an unconscious habit into a conscious choice, reframing it as a skill to be refined, not a weakness to be overcome. This allows individuals to maintain their authentic voices while navigating spaces not designed for everyone.

Three Takeaways for Intentional Hedging

The speaker offers three actionable takeaways:

1. When tired of making decisions, clearly articulate your preference: Instead of hedging, say, "My preference is to not make a decision today."
2. When overusing "I think," strategically claim knowledge: Save "I think" for when it serves a purpose. Use phrases like "I know," "as you know," or "the research shows."
3. When encountering bold, disagreeable declarations, ask "why": For example, if someone states, "We don't have a racism problem," ask, "I'd be interested to know why you've said that when all the research says the opposite."

Conclusion

Hedging is a tool that simultaneously conveys humility and uncertainty while enabling influence and persuasion. Learning to hedge intentionally is a journey that, once mastered, changes not only how others perceive you but also how you perceive yourself. The speaker concludes by noting that once you understand hedging, you will see it everywhere, much like noticing a specific car model after deciding to buy one.