Are we dating the same person groups - BBC Trending podcast, BBC World Service

Key Concepts

• Are We Dating The Same Guy (AWDTSG) groups: Facebook groups where women share information and experiences about men they are dating.
• Manosphere: A collection of online communities that believe men are discriminated against and that there is a crisis of masculinity.
• Retaliation groups: Online groups created in response to AWDTSG groups, often with the aim of humiliating women.
• Telegram: An encrypted messaging app known for its lax content moderation policies.
• Are We Dating The Same Girl (AWDTSGIRL) groups: Telegram groups where men share information and sexually explicit content of women without their consent.
• Revenge porn: Sharing sexually explicit images or videos of someone without their consent.
• Child Sexual Abuse Material (CSAM): Images or videos of children that are sexually explicit and illegal.
• Cyber Helpline: A UK charity that provides support to victims of cybercrime.
• Online Safety Act: A UK law that aims to regulate online content and protect users from harm.

Are We Dating The Same Guy (AWDTSG) Groups

• Origin and Purpose: AWDTSG groups started as a reaction to dating apps, allowing women to share information about men they were dating to identify potential cheaters or those with toxic/abusive behavior.
• Moderation: The groups are moderated to prevent bullying, sharing personal information (addresses), and making judgments about appearance. Nude pictures are also prohibited.
• Positive and Negative Experiences: Posts can range from warnings about negative experiences to positive feedback about men.
• Legal Issues: Men have filed lawsuits in the US, Australia, and Canada, accusing women of posting harmful and unproven claims.
• Example: Hannah, a woman in London, saw a man she had matched with on a dating app posted in an AWDTSG group. The comments revealed he was in jail for manslaughter.

Matt Napier and Victims of AWDTSG

• False Accusations: Matt Napier was posted in an AWDTSG group by a woman he briefly dated. The post accused him of leading women on, and comments included false allegations, such as claiming he lied about having cancer to break up with someone.
• Creation of Victims Group: To clear his name and address the harassment, Matt created the "Victims of Are We Dating the Same Guy" Facebook group.
• Purpose of Victims Group: Matt's group provides a platform for both men and women to share their stories and seek help in getting posts taken down.
• Perspective on AWDTSG: Matt believes that the harm caused to men's mental well-being outweighs any potential benefits of AWDTSG groups in protecting women.

Are We Dating The Same Girl (AWDTSGIRL) Groups on Telegram

• Emergence: Following the attention on AWDTSG groups, retaliation groups started appearing, including "Are We Dating The Same Girl" groups on Telegram.
• Telegram's Role: Telegram's lax content moderation and encryption make it a haven for harmful content, including terrorist content, CSAM, and now AWDTSGIRL groups.
• Content: The groups initially contained content similar to AWDTSG groups but quickly escalated to sharing sexually explicit images and videos of women without their consent, often recorded secretly.
• Scale: The groups grew rapidly, with some reaching thousands of members. There were multiple groups for different geographical locations.
• Illegal Content: BBC Trending found evidence that some groups contained images of children classified as illegal CSAM in the UK.
• Monetization: Some groups charged members for access to explicit content, with subscriptions ranging from £5 to £30.
• Telegram's Response: Telegram claims to have removed all AWDTSGIRL groups and channels earlier in the year and is actively removing attempts to recreate them. They also state that they remove hundreds of thousands of groups related to CSAM and terrorist content.

Jennifer and Moses' Experiences

• Jennifer's Infiltration: Jennifer, based in London, infiltrated an AWDTSGIRL Telegram group by creating a fake male profile.
• Moses' Observation: Moses, a university student in Coventry, joined a Telegram group through friends and witnessed the escalation of content.
• Jennifer's Actions: Jennifer screenshot posts containing women's personal information and contacted the women to inform them they were being posted in the group. She also contacted the police.
• Impact on Victims: Jennifer spoke to women who were devastated to learn their private images had been shared with thousands of men.

Legal and Regulatory Responses

• UK's Online Safety Act: Telegram states it is ready to abide by the UK's Online Safety Act.
• National Police Chiefs Council: The UK's National Police Chiefs Council wants technology companies, including Telegram, to do more to remove harmful content and work with law enforcement.
• Cyber Helpline: The Cyber Helpline states that groups that collect, create, and sell explicit content for money are illegal and becoming increasingly common.

Conclusion

The rise of "Are We Dating The Same Guy" groups has sparked a complex debate about safety, privacy, and accountability in the digital age. While intended to empower women and provide a platform for sharing information, these groups have also faced criticism for potential defamation and harassment. The emergence of retaliatory "Are We Dating The Same Girl" groups on platforms like Telegram, with their disturbing content and monetization, highlights the urgent need for stricter content moderation and legal frameworks to address online sexual abuse and protect individuals from harm. The responsibility lies not only with law enforcement but also with technology companies to actively combat harmful content and ensure the safety of their users.